The Philosopher is In

Ok, today I present an informative and somewhat scientific and philosophical blog. After the blood test Friday, I had to return today for a repeat blood test (standard procedure.) These tests (also known as beta tests) measure the amount of hCG (human chorionic gonadotropin or pregnancy hormone) in the blood. My specific fertility clinic likes to see the beta double every 48 hours. On Friday, my beta was 162, and today it was 300; obviously today's number wasn't as high as they would like it to be, so I have to return for another blood test on Friday. Now this could mean any number of things, none of which are shocking considering I am in the VERY early stages of pregnancy, which is a fragile time no matter what. So basically we're kind of in a holding pattern until Friday. If the numbers aren't as high as they want them on Friday, we will continue to wait and see what happens. Having read LOTS about betas before we ever started IVF, I was always aware of their meaning ... some books report betas much lower than mine which resulted in healthy pregnancies; some books report betas similar to mine which resulted in miscarriage. There's just no way to tell. But as the doctor, the nurse, and numerous other medical personnel continue to tell us, just getting pregnant is half the struggle. In my mind, infertility is a little like a war ( NOT exactly like a war as I would not put myself in the same category as our military fighting to bring down terrorists) made up of lots and lots of battles. We've won several battles already: getting all the way through an IVF cycle despite developing a cyst midway through, producing lots of eggs, having eggs that fertilized so they could be implanted and finally, getting pregnant on the very first try. Of course Anthony and I pray the beta number will be exactly where it's supposed to be on Friday, but in the meantime we have so much for which to be grateful and proud. God is with us, just as He always has been. (just as an aside, self is considering becoming a professional golfer but more on that later ...)

Pregnant Pause

had appointment with doctor today for blood test and very, very happy to report that self is PREGNANT!! only have three words: thank you, God ...

Hormones and Hypothermia

has been very nice day ... hormones have calmed down considerably but of course that could change at ANY second ...
Anthony continues to do well and has really been a good patient ...
latest progesterone injection excitement ... accidentally gave self hypothermia in right buttock tonight ... try very hard to completely numb area so as to not feel gigantic needle but went too far tonight. when removed ice pack discovered a sort of blistered area and buttock felt as solid as a piece of ice ... very disturbing indeed. in future will NOT numb buttocks for 30 minutes ...

All Aboard

happy to report Anthony is home and doing well ...
also happy to report self has learned valuable info regarding rice from emeril today on food network ... now know what risotto is (Italian rice dish) and how to make it ... haven't yet put newfound knowledge into practice but have high hopes for impressive gourmet meal ...
unhappy to report hormones continue haywire existence ... self is on roller coaster (along with unfortunate souls who are around me) and trying not to fall off!

You Say Psycho Like It's a Bad Thing

feeling somewhat better but still taking it very easy ... knight in shining armor is strict nurse but will have opportunity to pay back as he had shoulder surgery this morning and will be home tomorrow ... thank God for parents ...
may have spoken too quickly about IVF not being so bad -- self has turned into hormonal wreck ... suppose to be expected as am still wearing estrogen patches and getting gigantic progesterone in oil injections. as indicator of self's rapidly changing moods, NASA channel no longer interests as much as annoys me ... am proud of astronauts but little space shuttle graphic is quite irksome after awhile ( is "irksome" even a word??)

Houston, We Have a Problem

must apologize for recent lack of writing ... self has developed ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome ... not a shock as delicate ovaries were stimulated to produce many, many more eggs than usual. overstimulation has resulted in swollen ovaries which are now touching each other ... not comfortable to say the least. in state of continued taking it very easy have become addicted to NASA channel. only recently discovered existence of such channel but now watch all the time. switches from mission control to Discovery (no-gravity NOT kind to women's hairdos) to views of earth to wonderful little graphic of mini-Disovery as it criss-crosses the globe in its orbit. self is learning geography a whole new way. was talking to teri earlier and informed her space shuttle was now passing over the northwest tip of africa ... teri appropriately impressed to say the least ...
must take moment to update big-needle progesterone shots ... knight in shining armor gives this shot every night and does fantastic job. of course self's buttock completely numb from ice pack (as recommended) but still think knight in shining armor missed his calling. (NO comments about how shots may be easy to give to hormonally psycho wife) ... am also wearing two estrogen patches (as thin as gap filler removed from Discovery during genius spacewalk two days ago) to be changed every three days ... ahhh, just when things were returning to normal. such is the world of IVF ...

Invisible Ducky

bedrest almost over ... feeling a bit sore and bloated ... self greatly mortified when signed on to this site and pop-up ad appeared with huge feet on scale advertising weight-loss pill ... gross.
has rained LOTS here today ~ most of you know what that means ... LOVE POND. can hear frogs approaching from distance even as I write plus new and unidentified creature yet to be seen, only heard. sounds like duck quacking LOUDLY but can't find creature. knight in shining armor has certain-it's-illegal gigantic spotlight used to search for creature but no luck yet. ashamed to say that last week self slithered across bedroom floor out of view of window hoping to sneak up on ducky creature while knight outside with spotlight but again no luck. can hear it even now ... quack quack. ducky is taunting self ...

Day Three

Day Three following retrieval: transfer went fabulously well today ... as hoped by embryology team, two embryos were transferred into my uterus, both with the desired 7 cells on their way to 8 cells, one with a grade of 4 and one with a grade of 4+ ... (remaining 5 pre-embryos will continue developing, hopefully reaching desired quality so as to be cryogenically frozen for future cycles.) self is on modified bedrest for three days, meaning relaxing in bed watching TV or sitting up watching TV or reading ... allowed to get up to use bathroom, take shower or check mail ... nothing strenuous and nothing involving being on feet for more than a few minutes ... IVF is over, and self made it through ... hooray!!

Day Two

Day Two following egg retrieval: ok, instead of trying to explain the complete science currently in use self will just bottom line whole situation ... of 11 fertilized eggs, 2 multi-nucleated (not the desired pro-nucleated) and 9 pro-nucleated. now here we go ... on day 2 (today) the pre-embryos are given a grade of 1,2,3,4, or 5 based on the symmetry of the cells and the extent of cell fragmentation ... pre-embryos with a grade of 4 or 5 have a higher rate of implantation; anything graded 1,2 or 3 has a lower rate of implantation. so of our 9 remaining pre-embryos only 2 have a grade of 3, and 7 have a grade of 4 or higher. make sense?? basically we're in good shape going into tomorrow's embryo transfer ... of course, as always, anything can happen, but self feels good having made it this far and knows, again as always, that God is in charge ...

Day One

Day One following egg retrieval: of 17 eggs which were retrieved yesterday we now have 11 fertilized eggs ... still seems good number as of original 17 eggs, 14 were mature, and of those 14 eggs, 11 of them have now fertilized normally ... a smidge scientific and confusing but am re-reading lots of info, books, etc. as this part is hard to understand. will receive update tomorrow from embryologist following assessment of cell division ... will attempt to explain whatever self has figured out by then ...

The Love Shack

egg hunt very successful ... doctor retrieved 17 this morning but no need to panic or picture self on cover of good housekeeping with 17 children because not all eggs will be mature; however, doctor VERY pleased with 17 as is only looking for 4 mature eggs. self is over-achiever when it comes to active ovaries. fairly easy procedure this morning ... spent only a short time in recovery drinking Coke and watching SportsCenter before heading home ... was hooked up to IV, blood pressure cuff which annoyingly and automatically took self's BP every 5 minutes or so and also attached to some kind of EEG machine. moment of paranoid panic when EEG machine beeped ... thought self had flat-lined but realized was still talking to knight in shining armor and was just fine. room where egg retrieval performed is nicknamed "the love shack" by retrieval team ... wonderful group of people who almost make this fun. am scheduled for embryo transfer Saturday morning at 8 AM ... more later ...

Final Countdown

drumroll, please ... after a total of 43 days, 48 injections, 21 birth control pills, 7 trips to Mobile (6 in the last 11 days), one cyst aspiration and one almost catastrophic parking garage traffic backup due to elderly driver in super-long land yacht of a car trying to park in a tiny space ... THE EGGS ARE READY!! self has been given the go ahead for final injection at 9 PM tonight to be followed by one more trip to the vampire lab in Mobile in morning to be followed by egg retrieval at 8 AM Wednesday morning ... am cautiously excited as know there is always possiblity of no quality eggs during retrieval but still ... self is proud of making it this far ... after all, real fun begins after retrieval... will be done under anesthesia so will be able to come home later that day ... that night self will begin Medrol (a steroid to prevent body from rejecting embryos during transfer), Doxycycline (an antibiotic) and (my personal favorite) Progesterone in oil injections. Progesterone is used to supplement pregnancy and is an intramuscular injection given every night by knight in shining armor ... involves hip muscle and 1 1/2 inch needle. if become pregnant, will continue progesterone injections for first 12 weeks. but self is jumping ahead ... will get through retrieval and hopefully a transfer somewhere around 3-5 days later ... one day at a time and no more super long cars allowed in parking garage ...

Feisty Follicles

all systems still go ... ultrasound this morning was fine, and follicles are still growing ... #@*^&% bloodwork fine, too, but self is getting tired of having blood removed from body. minor annoyance in grand scheme of things. plan from here: new injectible med tonight (Repronex, still a follicle stimulator) in place of usual follicle stimulator (Gonal-F), then usual Lupron and Gonal-F injections in morning and repeat trip to Mobile for (bet you can't guess) ultrasound/bloodwork. doctor very complimentary of self's progress and is looking for egg retrieval around Thursday or Friday. more on that as it gets closer ...
must go ... have passed the point of no return with Harry Potter and must finish book tonight ...

Memo from a Muggle

Alright, for your reading pleasure I bring you a return to the planet of IVF. The ultrasound this morning went absolutely great, almost as well as it could, at least considering my feet were in stirrups, and my private parts were flappin' in the breeze ( a phrase just for you, Kel.) I have lots of follicles on both ovaries and am responding extremely well to the meds. This is all very good news ... please keep up the prayers as I have no doubt that's the reason we've gotten as far as we have. Our next dr's appt. will be Sunday morning for the ultrasound and it's-really-getting-SUPER-old bloodwork. I'm beginning to feel as though the lab staff has some sort of vampire streak in them ...
In the meantime, I've finally begun the new Harry Potter book, much to the happiness of my cousins, Kelly and Kate ... they are anxious to discuss theories, etc. about the new book. Incidentally, the new Potter book was well-discussed in a PACKED waiting room this morning. It took my mind off my usual in-my-head competition with others regarding ovaries, follicle size, etc. For all of you non-Potter readers out there, I'm sure all the frenzy is a bit annoying; however, I must say that from a writing standpoing, J.K. Rowling's is as good as it gets. Especially in this book, her writing is crisp, and not a single work is wasted. And of course, her imagination is beyond description ...

Power Tool Ban Lifted

no IVF talk today ... will update after dr's appt in the morning ...
recall now why self's ban on using power tools was in place ... got home from Wal-Mart short while ago (WILD there since kids out of school now) and decided would shape front shrubs. bad idea. dragged nice extension cord and power shrub shaper to front of house and got to trimming. suddenly shaper stopped and noticed self was now moving freely about in shrubs and no longer attached to cord. why, you ask?? because self cut right through extension cord ... yes, know was dangerous, Mom, but oh well. embarassment was first feeling as self dragged now two-piece extension cord back into garage. across the street neighbor witnessed incident, I believe, but maybe not as self was only working on shrubs for 15 seconds or so. terribly sad to look at nice extension cord just split like that but at least got one shrub shaped. power tool incident better than Christmas electricity incident when self decided to modify length of white Christmas lights by cutting strand with metal scissors ... lovely spark display but sometimes self just doesn't think things all the way through ...

Smokin' Hot Flashes

no more science blogs ... too boring. still rockin' along with injections, although self has been experiencing one common side effect: hot flashes ... apparently during IVF treatment, intensity of hot flashes is second only to hot flashes associated with menopause. delightful. at times feel smoke is radiating from my person as heat overtakes me ... is not fun by any stretch but not the worst side effect could be experiencing by far. grateful things have been non-dramatic so far. shall see as another injectible med (repronex) still must be added to the regimen ...
did not rebelliously use power tools today ... became self-conscious as shrubs self was going to trim with power tool are in front yard. afraid might lose control of power tool and have neighbors rushing over as self accidentally shaped shrubs into mickey mouse. opted instead for a lovely swim in inflatable pool. very relaxing despite constant threatening chatter by nearby squirrels ... have paranoid fear they will attack me one day as I lay defenseless on raft. have heard they can be mean creatures ...

Science and Power Tools

ok, all systems go for IVF after this morning's appt. very exciting as am in new territory; however must be cautiously optimistic as cycle could still be cancelled right up until the transfer of embryos into self's lovely uterus. possible reasons for cancellation you ask?? 1. poor response to ovarian stimulation by injectible meds (defined to be fewer than three or four follicles ... follicles are the little "house" for the eggs, and not to be an overachiever or anything, but I already have 9 on my right ovary and 6 on my left) 2. ovarian hyperstimulation ... just opposite of #1 and can lead to very,very swollen ovaries and hospitalization in rare cases. 3. premature LH surge ... LH surge triggers release of eggs from the follicles and doctors MUST get to eggs BEFORE release ... i.e. premature LH surge equals BAD THING and, finally, 4. abnormal estradiol (estrogen) response ... self has no idea what this means.
so planet of IVF continues to be opportunity for LOTS of learning and boring scientific blogs but oh well ... if super smart scientist happens upon modest blog and spots glaring error please refrain from writing me about it. thanks!
***must take moment as has been awhile and thank you ALL for continuing to read this little blog as well as e-mail me, etc. to see how things are going. self feels very, very grateful to have such wonderful friends and family ... and as for self's knight in shining armor?? absolutely no words to express gratitude as continue to be amazed by knight ... provides non-stop understanding, patience, laughter, unselfishness, optimism and of course, support. IVF is team sport and knight is going through it just as much as self, even if in slightly different way. thank God for him every day ...
next appt: Friday morning but certain will write before that as have plans to use power tools in front yard tomorrow ... not normally allowed to use power tools but aforementioned knight in shining armor is out of town. hmmmmm......

Day to Day to Day to Day

have had wonderful day in backyard mowing the grass, cleaning out the koi pond, cutting back shrubs, etc ... is nice to be outside in the morning before jungle heat takes over. despite self's almost fall into grass clippings graveyard just beyond small picket fence, all was well.
still feeling pretty good as continue IVF meds. as usual, small injections have gotten annoying but that's about it. ultrasound/bloodwork appointment in morning and will be day to day from here on out ... VERY tentative retrieval date is in one week but at this point anything goes ... cycle could still be cancelled at any time for variety of reasons. will discuss in tomorrow's blog as must re-research topic. expect MANY trips to Mobile in next few days ...

Forward March

all is still well ... cyst was aspirated with very little discomfort. no delicate way to describe procedure ... large ultrasound-guided needle inserted through vaginal wall to drain cyst. sounds much worse than actual experience, especially since wonderful doctor numbed the area. feel numbing medicine has surely worn off by now but still feel fine. cannot speak highly enough of doctor and nurses in Mobile. absolutely amazing ...
ok, so on we go to next part of IVF cycle ... here I must correct myself from a few days ago. Lupron injections will continue all the way through IVF cycle, not stop as I originally thought ... tonight have added Gonal-F injections to the mix (one injection in morning and one in evening) which will stimulate ovaries to produce lots of follicles (eggs.) will return to Mobile Tuesday morning for ultrasound and bloodwork. frequency of trips will greatly increase as doctor will very closely monitor follicles from now to retrieval ...
on we go on our little planet of infertility ...

Queen of Cysts

ok, unpredictability of IVF still very much intact ... appointment went fine today. have cyst on left ovary but will have needle aspiration done tomorrow morning to drain cyst and current IVF cycle WILL continue. really great news and very unexpected after seeing cyst on ultrasound this morning. needle aspiration procedure takes around 2 minutes and is in-office procedure. no worries ... may experience discomfort (hello, large needle) but will be short-lived. will most likely begin next phase of IVF injections tomorrow night. and so it goes ...

Hit By Eighteen Wheeler

very tired today, as if eighteen wheeler hit self, backed up and did it again ... am 14 days into Lupron shots so definitely to be expected. trying to downplay tomorrow in my mind but will be very big day ... mind distracted at present by Anthony and a friend of his playing the brand new NCAA football Playstation 2 game. thank God for sports and games, right??

Reproductive Endocrinology 101

Ok, I thought I would use tonight's blog to review the (maybe) upcoming portion of IVF. Right now, I'm finishing up Lupron, which is used to prevent the pituitary gland from interfering with ovarian function during ovarian stimulation. This basically means the pituitary gland is out of commision ... in other words, it won't send any signals to the ovaries to release eggs. This is all done so that the doctors are able to retrieve the mature eggs BEFORE they're released from the ovaries, a very crucial part of IVF. The next step is the bloodwork/ultrasound appointment on Thursday morning. This will be a big step as it will determine if we continue this cycle. Specifically they'll be looking for ovarian cysts which could throw off the whole cycle, but assuming we get the green light to continue on, I'll stop Lupron and start a drug called Gonal-F. This is still a daily injection, but it's part of the stimulation portion of IVF. This is the part where the drugs are used to stimulate your ovaries to produce as many eggs as they can. Approximately 5-8 days after beginning Gonal-F, I'll begin Repronex (also a daily injection.) These drugs are used in conjunction with each other because one contains FSH (follicle-stimulating hormone) and one contains a combination of FSH and LH (luteinizing hormone.)
Ok, I know all of this is incredibly foreign to most people, so here's the quick summary: Thursday is a huge day ... either we'll stop or continue IVF. If we continue, I'll take drugs to stimulate my ovaries to produce a LOT of eggs. The end.

Out of Control

DO NOT mean this personally, but weather channel people are completely OUT OF CONTROL!! saw footage of Jim Cantore last night wearing swim goggles and standing on the beach as Hurricane Dennis roared in ... what is wrong with these people?? in middle of his broadcast a tiny cloth came into view wiping rain off the camera lens ... have mercy. of course on flip side of coin, what is wrong with self as weather channel viewing lasted most of yesterday? can't help but be sucked into frenzy, a frenzy which will likely remain as tropical wave is now in picture. will be Hurricane Emily if becomes a named storm. why not call it Hurricane Extra Dangerous??
Lupron bleed continues ...

Hurricane Preparedness

feel obligated to take a moment to share a few things self has learned during hurricane preparedness ... first (and brace yourselves here), the moon is set to explode in six months. yes, it is ... was able to speed-read this little morsel of info from a tabloid yesterday while in line at wal-mart. second, always wear gloves while handling plywood ... prevents spending time digging out splinters. third, exercise LOTS of patience with weather channel people as they are whipped into frenzy by current weather situation. bear with them as they say things like, "will rain continue to affect the midwest over the weekend? stay with us and find out after the break." no need to scream "WHO CARES ABOUT THE MIDWEST??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?" at tv as self is more interested in finding out how far west hurricane-force rain and wind will reach ... finally, best not to voice OUT LOUD self's fear that koi pond may develop mini hurricane during storm, causing fish to be thrown onto land and die. won't happen ... at least husband waited until he was out of the room to laugh.

Trying to Reason With Hurricane Season

Dennis has now become overachieving Category 4 hurricane with winds around 145 mph ... should be in the Gulf soon and will have better idea of its track in next 24 hours or so ... have plywood if decide to stay and full tank of gas and place to go if decide to evacuate ... watching and waiting.
in meantime have had wonderful event in IVF world ... usually 7-10 days after beginning Lupron injections one gets (male readers avert your eyes) the "lupron bleed." never had this happen last time as had cyst that threw whole cycle off ... however, today find self in beginning of lupron bleed (like a period) and am very excited! know sounds gross but is hopeful sign that all is progressing normally and perhaps cycle will be cyst-free ...

Shout Out to Dennis

hello, hurricane dennis!! is category three at the moment and who knows where it's going. went to grocery store for supplies today ... enterprising employees construct delightful displays this time of year ... almost makes being hit by a hurricane seem fun. big coolers, food on the grill, festive paper cups and plates, etc. can see self sitting outside no electricity home grilling delicious meals whilst serving canned beans, canned vienna sausages and bottled water to neighbors if dennis comes here. keeping close eye on things ...
day 8 of lupron in the books. still doing fine ... trying not to look too far ahead and only focusing on july 14.
frogs still being exceptionally bold ... as trying to respect all of God's creatures will say no more than that.

*$&%*#@*&^ Frogs

(Update: radio ghost completely OUT OF CONTROL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
many happenings since last entry ... Tropical Storm Cindy roared in early this morning, leaving over 5 inches of rain at our house ... yes, as always, horny frogs accompanied rain ... self thought ahead of the game and covered the pond well before bed last night but alas, no good. around 4 AM heard freakishly loud mating call (loudest ever) so quietly left bedroom for guest room across house and FAR away from love pond ... found someone already in guest room (husband) so moved into other guest room with mary and hope ... self and self's husband investigated pond situation this AM and discovered frogs have become VERY bold ... found HUGE frog "coupled up" with other frog friend ON TOP OF pond covering ... self has been outsmarted by horny frogs ... very depressing thought.
on IVF front, am at end of 7th day of Lupron injections ... still feeling pretty good except for being tired. self is willing ovaries not to grow cysts but shall see ... in meantime, am very much enjoying new infertility book written by two women who have actually been through all of this. very funny and honest.
sweet Hopie has been to the vet today ... has allergy problems so have now spent small fortune for antihistamine, antibiotic to treat skin infection, medicated shampoo, medicated conditioner, and skin treatment to eliminate flea issues ... money well spent as she's our baby.
weather channel meteorologist still in town as Hurricane (?) Dennis now heads our way ... very exciting but is still days away. lots can still happen.

Cindy and Dennis

ah, the excitement of hurricane season ... tropical storm Cindy (but possibly on her way to being a weak hurricane?) is en route to our fair coast and dennis is close behind ... very exciting as mike seidel (of the weather channel) is in Biloxi just outside Treasure Bay casino ... plan mini-trip to beach for autograph.
not great day with radio ghost AT ALL -- got inspection sticker for car today ... was out of car with motor running and driver side door open assisting (holding bulb) mechanic with replacing rear brake light ... suddenly Van Halen was BLARING across the garage with numerous mechanics staring at me and my possessed car ... very mortifying but at least michael will be proud ...
IVF schedule moving along ... finished birth control pills last night and continuing lupron shots ...9 more days of shots til ultrasound ...

Redneck Pet Parents

continuing Lupron injections, still with no problems ... big test will be July 14 ultrasound to check for ovarian cysts ... is point where IVF cycle was cancelled last time so should be interesting how it goes ...
have enjoyed beautiful afternoon in inflatable pool with Anthony, Mary and Hope (our border collie) ... Hopie took to a raft and floated around for a bit ... Mary loves to swim but as pool is three feet deep she is unable to stand up ... she swam some then we became redneck pet parents ... self and self's husband sunk a canvas fold-out chair in pool so she could stand up. good grief. expect jeff foxworthy to be calling anytime now.

Frogs, Frogs and Frogs

no problem with first Lupron shot this morning ... will continue Lupron injections until next ultrasound july 14 ...
received 4-5 inches of rain yesterday so of course mating frogs have returned with a vengeance ... self tromped out to koi pond yesterday in hopes of warding them off but no luck. was dressed in t-shirt, shorts, tall black rubber boots and carrying only umbrella could locate quickly: some gold lamee looking thing ... managed to get cover over pond but frogs found one small hole during the night and invited all their friends ... HIDEOUS noise ... can still hear it reverberating in head.

Go for IVF

ok, IVF to move into full-swing tomorrow morning ... lupron shots will start. tiny needle, no big deal ... lupron shots are already-traveled territory from our first half-IVF cycle. (recall first IVF cycle was cancelled after lupron shots due to ovarian cyst.) next ultrasound scheduled for july 14 ... will be a big day for self and knight-in-shining-armor anthony as any injections occurring after that date will be new to us ... hoping lupron shots will go as well as last time but will see ...

Lord Alfred Tennyson

must write this morning as had most interesting dream last night ... obviously was still thinking about Kel's beautiful wedding ... dreamed we were having one final pre-wedding party at the home of Lord Alfred Tennyson. absolutely no clue about this one but know high school English teacher would be SO proud (hello, Mr. Locke) ... even in dream was amazing that family was gathered at Tennyson's home as he was poet laureate of England but more amazing because he was poet laureate in 1850 and is, therefore, very dead ...

Return of the Cysts but also IVF

(ok, third time will be charm ... somehow have erased this blog twice already ...)
am officially citizen of infertility planet ... AM ultrasound showed two fairly good size cysts (surprise) but not big enough to interfere with IVF cycle ... as a result, have already done one-time PM injection of Cetrotide ... med was added in to help with cysts as well as to prevent premature ovulation ... in my case, Cetrotide injection is done once, then regular IVF protocol resumes. for me, that means continuing birth control pills until July 4, beginning Lupron injections this Thursday morning and eventually adding two more injectables to the mix ... not as complicated as it sounds ... basic function of Lupron is to shut down ovaries so that self's body is no longer in charge of triggering ovulation ... function of additional meds (Gonal-F and Repronex) is to stimulate ovaries to produce numerous eggs which will be retrieved at a yet-to-be-determined but VERY precise moment ... more about retrieval later ...
self felt VERY competitive in waiting room this morning with many other IVF patients ... wondered how far along process they were and if they had cysts like I or perfect ovaries to which I can only aspire ... important to focus only on self's progression through IVF cycle but would still like to win ... win what I don't know but I'd like to all the same ...

All Good Things Must Come to an End

wedding has come and gone ... absolutely wonderful weekend and breathtaking wedding ... cannot imagine more beautiful bride than Kelly. very, very happy for her and very, very grateful for own family ... as am geographically challenged cannot immediately think of honeymoon destination for Mr. and Mrs. Michael Day but believe it is Jamaica?? shall see ...
realize self has veered way off course as far as original subject of this blog but rest assured that is about to change. pre-IVF ultrasound/bloodwork scheduled for tomorrow morning. joy. have bought new infertility book published just last month so feel will be up to date with current information ... Katie Couric interviewed authors on the Today show so feel book will be lively and informative ... shall report tomorrow.

Wedding Weekend Kick-Off

alrightee, about two more days now ... feel we have relative calm before the storm (not that the wedding will be a storm or anything, just finishing the old saying) big wedding weekend kick-off tonight with aunt mar's famous gumbo and about 70 wedding guests/family members/members of both aformentioned groups/friends/wedding party members/anyone who passes by the house/strangers who pop in, etc. will be great fun ...
on planet of infertility,self continuing re-reading IVF resources, including this webpage ... provides pretty good account of what all went on last time. baseline ultrasound/bloodwork set for Monday, June 27 @ 8 AM ... doctor will be checking hormone levels as well as hunting for cysts ... perhaps will wear camouflage scrubs for the hunt ...

Amazon Goddess

(4 more days ...)
am in full-on preparation mode for rapidly approaching wedding. have been fervently hoping one side effect of birth control pills would grace me with its presence: breast enlargement ... so far no such luck. still hoping ...
have also been attempting to transform from semi-albino status to amazon goddess. cannot use self-tanning lotions as self seems to be allergic to them, and tanning beds are out of the question as resident knight-in-shining-armor husband Anthony works for the American Cancer Society. however, new pool purchase seems to be helping issue ... is 15 feet in diameter and 3 feet deep. perfect for drifting around in lounge raft with bottled water by side (part of purifying self before resumption of IVF.) have come up with new tanning invention ... instead of having to turn over every so often to avoid the dreaded fell-asleep-in-the-sun lobster red on one side and ghost white on the other, feel self could perhaps invent rotisserie type device to evenly keep self tan (or anybody else for that matter.) could safely and slowly rotate self in pool to maintain even sun exposure ...have not at all figured out the logistics of such invention ... surprise.

The Planet of Infertility

(5 more days ...)
apologize for inexcusable neglect of blog ... wedding is mere days away, and Kelly (who is home now) is amazingly calm. spent Friday with her doing errands ... very excited for her and Michael and ready for all family to arrive in town :)
continue taking birth control pills and hopefully dissolving any cysts before ultrasound appointment next monday in mobile ... brushing up on all things IVF and removing huge resource binder to browse for pertinent info. amazing how quickly you forget necessary info once you've left planet of infertility ...
must share humor for today ... hopefully is not plagiarism but must discuss anonymous letter sent to our paper here in Gulfport ... writer has idea to build enormous fan to place on beach here and blow any hurricanes heading our way back out into the Gulf ... cannot think anyone could seriously think this would work but good for a laugh anyway ... trying to picture humongous size of fan and imagining how one would power such a device ...

Game On

realized have forgotten to mention we are back into IVF ... started birth control pills last night, which is the first step. Game on ...
had annual gynecological exam yesterday ... always amused by enormous paper "clothes" they give you to cover up. at this point I just want to get on the table stark naked and forget all the paper. paper vest to open in the front with stylish plastic belt/sash and paper picnic-tablecloth size garment to cover rest of self. honestly what is the point? by the time vest is covering boobs, armholes are so huge self is still on display. too much paper to fool with in my opinion.

Dressing Room Danger

(10 days ...)
ok, second time will be the charm with this blog ... wrote last night but somehow erased entire thing with one keystroke ... will re-write now.
terrible occurrence in Dillard's yesterday. was roaming around looking for fab dress to wear to rehearsal dinner. found several and went to try them on. first was really cute little dress ( I stress LITTLE) that had to be seriously worked with to fit on self. looked great but could not breathe out so knew dress would not work. attempted to remove dress over head (removed bra to assist process) but dress absolutely would NOT budge. mild panic as dress was super tight but moved to recently formed plan B, which was to remove dress over hips. had to be stealthy as others were in dressing room and felt dress could very likely split wide open at any moment not to mention the flailing about and jumping up and down self was doing. cannot possibly stress the not budging issue nor the fear I was feeling at this point ... would self be forced to stagger out into the middle of Dillard's screaming for help with dress lodged around mid-section like a spare tire?!?! too ghastly to even contemplate ... rested a moment with dress firmly lodged on buttock area and resumed delicate yanking to get dress off of self. TWENTY minutes later (no exaggeration because had to be somewhere else so was keeping eye on time) and with numerous minor bruises on self, dress was removed with no splitting. sweet relief ... was very, very frightening experience. wanted to use cell phone to call for help but knew other people in dressing room would hear. have learned valuable lesson ... self has NO reason to be shopping in the junior department anymore.

Where In the World Is Arlene?

(unbelievably, 14 days til the wedding)
playing a familiar game today ... the watch, wait and see about the tropical storm. has shifted slightly west overnight and looks to be coming in somewhere around Mobile or a little farther east. pretty much where big bad Hurricane Ivan rolled in last year. ahhh, the risk we take living so close to the water ...
as often is the case, weather channel on quite a bit so have chance to study forecasters as self finds maps uninteresting (and a smidge confusing) feel forecasters sitting at main desk coordinate outfits as man's tie often blends with woman's outfit. pretty to look at ...
nothing like a tropical storm to distract self from IVF although will be making appropriate calendar soon in anticipation of getting back into the game. am dusting off Rocky IV soundtrack as is motivating for return trips to Mobile ... may sound strange but have discovered whatever helps make it through is just fine ...

Big Fat Honkin' Error

must apologize for oversight on Tuesday ... was so caught up in IVF and mentally lethargic due to jungle temps that forgot to mention it was Teri's birthday :( as she has been best friend since we were three years old, self regrets error ... must have been very caught up in IVF as was at her surprise party that very night ...

Tropical Storm Arlene

(16 days ...)
one week into hurricane season and we have anxious little arlene forming out in the gulf ... presently is tropical storm but who knows ...
have discovered weather channel has been productive during break from hurricane coverage last year ... as weather people excitedly discuss Arlene on TV, new little white airplane graphic is displayed on top of the map over the hurricane to indicate where the hurricane hunters are ... absolutely KNOW weather people live for hurricane season as brings new energy into forecasting ... feel will meet a famous weather channel personality sometime during this hurricane season as they are always spread out across the southeast ... will get autograph and a weather channel hat ...

Return to IVF

(18 days, Kel ...)
Ok, just like that we're back to IVF ... started period yesterday, and that's all it takes ... do not have to repeat Cycle Day 3 ultrasound/bloodwork .... retrieval date has been moved back from July 19 until a few days later due to the fact that the IVF schedule is super busy right now. Anyway, here's a tentative schedule for anyone who desires to try to keep up (I dare you :)

June 14-July 4: birth control pills
June 27: baseline ultrasound/bloodwork
June 28: begin Cetrotide injections (new medicine for this cycle to prevent the LH surge, which can lead to premature ovulation)
June 30: begin Lupron injections (15 Units); continue Cetrotide and birth control pills.
July 14: ultrasound/bloodwork; reduce dosage of Lupron injections to 5 Units.
What happens after this ultrasound will depend entirely on bloodwork and if I have a cyst or not ... In the meantime will enjoy remaining days until beginning hormonal craziness ...

Relay for Life

(22 days until the wedding...)
We have just returned from the Biloxi Relay for Life, which is one of the most wonderful events we are involved in as a result of Anthony's job with the American Cancer Society. For those of you who have never been, it is an absolutely extraordinary experience. Relay for Life events are held virtually everywhere ... one of ours down on the Coast (George County) recently raised $117,000.00. However, make no mistake about it, although the money is obviously important, the event is about so much more than that. It is an opportunity for anyone touched by cancer in anyway to come together in celebration ... celebration of life to honor those who have lost their lives to cancer, those who are battling cancer, those who have survived cancer, caregivers and the list goes on and on. The survivors make the first lap around the track (or in this case the sidewalk circling the Town Green) to the applause of everyone in attendance ... it is in this lap when you see that cancer knows no boundaries as far as age, race, etc. You will see toddlers who have survived cancer all the way up to grandparents who have survived cancer - all walking together. And from a rather shallow and very human perspective, I am always struck by those people who arrive with no concern about their hair loss from chemotherapy, those who have realized there is much more to life than worrying about what others will think. There is a greater purpose for these people, and all say they are different people than they were before they were diagnosed. Their courage is staggering and humbling. For me, the Relays are always intensely personal because several people very close to me have passed away in the last several years as a result of cancer. I won't name all of them, but I must mention my Grandma Calvert because her birthday would have been this Sunday. She passed away in 2001 from multiple myeloma and could never actually bring herself to say the word "cancer." However, as with the people at the Relay tonight, I was also humbled by her courage. I like to think that I was exactly where she wanted me to be tonight ... across from the water watching a beautiful sunset in the company of some truly amazing and brave people with whom I was privileged to celebrate. Happy early birthday, Grandma ...

Sniper Fears

for readers with prior knowledge of my irrational sniper fear, read on ... for readers with no prior knowledge of said fear halt reading here as continuing could perhaps paint picture of self as a lunatic. for kicks anthony brought home red laser pointer from work today ... VERY similar to red laser pointers attached to guns and most assuredly NOT one of my most favorite things. will not go on from here as assume everyone can see where this is going. red laser pointer is now hidden from husband but might find its way into destructive waters of koi pond, which has inexplicably stopped leaking. no clue why.
**just to clarify, husband did not bring a gun home, merely a ballpoint-pen sized laser pointer such as one might use for a presentation**
[with absolutely no connection to sniper discussion will officially begin countdown to Michael and Kelly's wedding: 23 days ...]

Cowboy and Phoebe

well, where to begin?? after TORRENTIAL downpours on Sunday the froggie love pond was in full swing Monday morning ... Anthony removed 15-20 frogs from the pond that morning, many of them already copulating (for lack of a better word) necessary trip was made to Lowe's Monday afternoon for supplies to appropriately cover love pond, and to this date only two frogs have made it through the barrier. still not good viewing for early morning awakening ... too many frogs riding around the current all partnered up.
have made a breakthrough with hideous coughing ... chest congestion is beginning to break up and coughs are becoming more productive ... that's all I'll say about that.
new pond drama for the day ... seems pond may have sprung a leak ... I think Bess and Bo did it; Anthony says not possible. Still, we're working to figure out what's going on and keeping the pond filled in the meantime. cowboy, phoebe and friends will be taken care of...
utilizing the most of downtime until IVF resumes although have begun re-reading several books on infertility to get prepared ... will not be caught off-guard again with bloodwork levels. meds still in fridge until next month ... in meantime am waiting on period then a repeat of Cycle Day 3 bloodwork.
in celebrity world, what is general opinion of readership regarding tom cruise and katie holmes?? defended them at first but now think tom may have gone off the deep end. still, we'll always have top gun ... no one can take that away.

Puzzle Theory

has been lazy, cough-filled weekend ... biggest accomplishment today was major progress on jigsaw puzzle I started yesterday ... ok, though, as has been storming here all day. discovered back to back to back to back to back snake movies on FX. called python, boa and the snake king ... certainly made bess and bo look like house pets. not to worry, mom, they will be outdoor house pets ... must return to puzzle as have just discovered several connected fence post pieces ... realize may sound like petty happening but is actually very important ... when have more time will share puzzle theory ... is intelligent and pertinent.

Bess and Bo

no comment on sinus problems as continue hacking cough and feeling of lethargy ...
have named new snake friends Bo and Bess ... no significance. names just came to self this morning. anthony found snake skins in the backyard ... suppose bo and bess are shedding their old skins. very interesting as mary and hope have been circling snake skins all afternoon jabbing at them with a paw and jumping back. dogs are tiny people who are spoiled rotten and love indoor life so likely not to be greatest hunters. ok, though, as would not like them to find bess or bo and potentially hurt them ... have decided to embrace snake friends (NOT literally) as newest additions to backyard menagerie. will be nice to have around.
cold front rolling through tonight ... is only 78 degrees outside.

Big Disappointment

has NOT been greatest of days ... still not feeling good at all with coughing and other sinus malfunction so will be missing big bachelorette weekend ... disappointed beyond words.
snake friend (yes, self is becoming fond of him/her??) made appearance today. likes to lay across rocks and relax by pond. somewhat endearing if truth be told. must think of good name for him/her and for his other snake friend ...

Wild Kingdom

****HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BEAUTIFUL MOTHER****
did not write last night due to continuing sinus infection ... yesterday found malfunctioning sinuses draining down back of throat, causing the inevitable nausea, which led to the inevitable conclusion of nausea. went to bed early in hopes of feeling much better today. alas, was not meant to be. have been in bed majority of day with headache/drainage down back of throat/coughing ... timidly eating saltines and drinking sprite in hopes of preventing repeat of yesterday's stomach-emptying episode. no really delicate way to put that.
anyway still interesting day despite being in bed for much of it ... anthony out of town for night which always sets off some bizarre occurrence. was almost asleep in bed when Hope (our wonderful and brilliant border collie) became very alert at bedroom window. window overlooks koi fish pond (yes, koi have names of Cowboy, Phoebe, George, Carolyn and Donald) which was setting for veritable "animal kingdom" episode. dragged coughing self to window just in time to see black snake emerge from water. (permission to Miss Debbie to stop reading here.) was horrified as snake slithered along and came to rest just outside window ... was like car wreck ... could not look away. realized snake had dislocated portion of filter for fish pond but not the main filter. still fearful for lives of precious fish ... as watched hideous snake move stealthily along pond and surrounding greenery realized snake was attracted to our home as other creatures such as turtles, squirrels, mice, etc. still snakes are scary and not completely welcome guests ... I use the plural form because as I sat watching original snake a second snake emerged from beneath deck. both snakes slithered along to come to rest on one of the rocks around pond to peacefully sunbathe. made 4 frantic calls to anthony in baton rouge, roughly 25 calls to teri to report on every move of snakes and possible scenarios for my fixing filter at pond, 1 call to friend Jennifer who used to live next door, and 5-8 calls to cousin Danielle, who assured me her husband, Craig, could come over to assist me in crisis (craig works about 2 minutes from our home.) (also called mom, who was equally horrified at hideous situation) while talking to Teri, decided self could handle situation and could quietly move around pond to fix filter without snake friends knowing. was in pajamas at time but (no laughter allowed) went to put on black dressy high-heeled black boots that zip up to knee for protection. went outside but could not bring self to go near pond. thankfully, Craig came by to fix filter and actually looked for snakes as not fearful of them. more power to him and my undying gratitude as resident knight in shining armor is in Baton Rouge and self needed help.
continuing to rest ... trying to recuperate so can go to excellent bachelorette party of cousin kelly, which is to be this weekend ...

Blue Rabbit Palace

am actually afraid to get in car now ... radio operates of its own accord and is very scary. will be riding along listening to music (yes, lately 'N Sync) at normal volume, hit one tiny bump and am being blown out of vehicle by possessed radio. must remedy situation ...
had wonderful lunch with Teri and the girls and a friend of ours and her two kids at Blue Rabbit Palace something or other in Mobile ... is large kid-friendly place with food and LOTS of games, play areas, and a train I was most distressed to discover I was too old (tall) to ride. looked like great fun, though. spent much of time climbing with Abby in the infant area and playing mini-skeeball. also attempted to get dolphin toy with robotic "claw" device for one of the kids. total rip-off if anyone wants my opinion. "claw" requires TWO tokens per one try and is (of course) made so won't pick up desired object AT ALL. very impatient with claw and ashamed at how many tokens self put in machine on behalf of kids ... more ashamed that self picked up NOTHING during numerous tries ...

Drive-Through Oil Change

(update on nasal malfunction: improving but have suggestion from Kelly on some new medicine to try ... will report more tomorrow)
have been out most of the day running errands in jungle temps ... love living by the water but one trade-off is incredibly warm and HUMID weather. sometimes just want to go out naked ... know would be wildly inappropriate and could possibly land in jail so will refrain. cannot be in Kelly's wedding if find self in the slammer.
new establishment going up on highway 49 ... will be (according to sign) a 5-minute oil change garage. know absolutely nothing about oil changing (shock) but seems the sort of thing that should take more than 5 minutes. afraid may lead to new competition among oil-changing businesses with one becoming a 4 minute oil change place, then 3 minutes until finally the inevitable happens. we simply drive-through to have our oil changed without ever stopping the vehicle ... scary thought. or perhaps genius thought. perhaps will learn from internet and open own drive-through business. nah, even scarier thought.

Risky Business

has been major nasal malfunction day ... completely unable to breathe through nose due to severe congestion. spent day at home doing nothing except watching 'N Sync concerts on DVD and breathing entirely through mouth, which is annoying at best. am better now, though, as one side of nose has inexplicably cleared. sick day has cost me intense exercise time so will have to make it up tomorrow or will bust out of bridemaid's dress at wedding. mortifying thought.
as was home all day was able to keep abreast of major news stories. seems weather people are predicting big excitement for upcoming hurricane season ... feel hurricane season is major event for them. love to watch weather people reporting on hurricanes DURING the storm from OUTSIDE an interior wall of a sturdy building. hee hawed last year as stephanie somebody reported in gale-force winds with her producers holding her legs to keep her from blowing away ... wonder if weather people feel we are impressed by their reporting with all electrical equipment while standing in pounding rain?? cannot possibly be safe idea and wonder if their mothers know what they're doing?? guess so since engage in risky behavior on national tv ...

Don't Cry Out Loud

am still recovering from tonight's edition of "Extreme Home Makeover"... is wonderful show but headache-inducing as always throw self onto carpet and cry hysterically at show's conclusion. actually am usually tearful throughout show but end is worst. crying is well beyond the kleenex variety and over into paper towel land ...
currently watching the History Channel (guess who has the remote) ... network a bit frightening as is difficult to tell what is actual footage and what is re-enactment of historic event. have become better as was informed by wonderfully patient husband of the invention date of videocamera so was disappointed to learn that recent program on Civil War was not actual footage. of course am kidding ... history not usually something of interest to me to be truthful. believe if history repeats itself will simply wait for it the next go around.

Joy Joy

is joyous day!! spoke again with dr's office and am all clear to be in the wedding. simply re-scheduled IVF cycle until July ... very grateful as can't imagine self being anywhere but at the wedding. now must whip self into shape so as to be able to exhale in bridesmaid dress. is a smidge tight but will work out diligently until June 25 (the wedding date.) have already done jogging (in place inside the house as jungle temps have returned with a vengeance), weight-lifting, and 150 sit-ups. will now go take relaxing bath to soothe muscles, then do more working out. actually have chance to firm up as won't be doing ANY weight-inducing shots until after the wedding. did receive most special honor today ... am (according to IVF doctor who has been in the "business" for awhile) "the queen of all ovarian cyst growers." am so proud but will be humble as realize not everyone is that talented. will not gloat ...

Turmoil and IVF

ok, must apologize for neglect of this page. have returned now ...
newest update: Anthony and I are back in the world of IVF. had baseline ultrasound and bloodwork yesterday. all is good for IVF with one gigantic hitch ... moving forward with current cycle brings with it a 99% chance of being unable to be in Kelly's wedding. has to do with retrieval and transfer dates, neither of which can really be changed to suit the patient's schedule. is large and VERY difficult decision to say the least ...
for those who don't know must explain about Kelly ... is first cousin but in actuality is much more like sister. is difficult to explain how important she is to me. was born only 36 hours before me so grew up with her. is hard to find baby pictures where we are not with each other and absolutely cannot fathom not being in her wedding. am waiting for some sign from God because KNOW there is a bigger plan. just wish knew what it was.

Ghost

has been fabulous Mother's Day ... am blessed with most wonderful mother anyone could ever dream of. don't necessarily deserve her but thank God everyday for the fact that she's mine. never known anyone with such capacity to love and am most grateful for her example ...
back to bizarre world I live in ... am currently dealing with ghost in car radio. was riding home Friday night from dinner in Bay St. Louis (mom in car with me; dad and anthony in his car) when suddenly radio took on life of its own and volume began to go up though we weren't touching it. went to volume level 32 (who knew radio could get so loud) before could get it to go off. very scary and not sure what caused it.
IVF update: period has started (hooray) so will be calling IVF nurse Sabrina tomorrow for appointment to schedule cycle day 3 ultrasound and bloodwork. here we go again ...

Cinco de Mayo

have had wonderful evening celebrating cinco de mayo at favorite mexican restaurant with lots of family ... know is holiday celebrating independence of mexico but why?? of whom did they become independent?? discussed this at dinner and nobody knew. still is great fun to celebrate anything!! of course, as self is preparing for re-entry into the world of IVF only celebrated with consumption of water not Corona.
feel over-exercised yesterday as am unable to fully turn neck to the left. no idea why but is a smidge painful. still forced self to do lots of sit-ups today on way to fabulous rock-hard body. not too rock-hard, though, as have NO desire to look like those Miss Universe contestants who are bodybuilders. frightening.
and now an update on Mr. Rambo: sweetest bird have ever had ... Mr. Roxy and Mr. Rambo wonderful companions who sit side by side all day. still feel Mr. Rambo is turning into a woman but no problem with that. will only concern self when she needs a tiny bird bra.

Horror in Hallmark

actually exercised today, not just in the virtual world. sit-ups, free weights ... on way to Broadway dancer body.
hideous experience in Hallmark shop today. have apparently waited til last second to buy Mother's Day cards and experienced HUGE volume of people in card shop. can handle that except HUGE volume of people included some young child who read every single card OUT LOUD to her mother so they could choose an appropriate one for the child's grandmother. seemed every little section I moved toward she followed. must be what stars feel like as paparazzi lurk about trying to get pictures of them ...
am listening to favorite boy band as I write (N Sync) ... am not ashamed as excellent music with peppy rhythm. however, am ashamed as to how many of their dance routines I know as have worn out tape with Madison Square Concert on it. still, dancing is good exercise and many N Sync routines are rather elaborate. perhaps will strive to be dancer for N Sync instead of Broadway dancer. perhaps not as Justin Timberlake has gone solo. their loss, though.

Return of the iPod

have had joyous day today!! don't think I mentioned previously that Anthony got me an iPod to use on my numerous trips to Mobile for IVF stuff. tragedy occurred (use word loosely as don't count this occurrence in same category as tsunamis and the like) a couple of weeks ago when iPod basically crashed. had to send to apple repair people (free of charge) and have missed it terribly. have felt hollow inside without fabulous pink slimline music library. joy restored to life today as iPod was delivered good as new!! self feels whole again.
making absolutely zero progress toward rock-hard body as seen in "Chicago." sad but true. feel will begin tomorrow. or as Mary Jo Shively said on the ever-relevant "Designing Women," will engage in virtual exercise, thereby imagining self working out and developing toned body. actually am engaging in it now ... self has just completed 500 sit-ups. amazing.

No Place Like Home

am back home in Gulfport after wonderfully fun road trip ... left Columbus Saturday for Birmingham, where visited Kate (cousin) and her husband, Jim and other cousin (Emily) and saw the musical "Chicago." am wildly motivated to work on sculpting own body after viewing INCREDIBLY in-shape dancers. will begin strict regimen another day of course as am enjoying time at home with Anthony, Mary and Hope.
had eventful trip back today. teri, kinsey and abby were with me, and abby took a nap that totaled 30 minutes so she was tired. teri and I felt the sun was in her eyes so came up with idea to roll up section of newspaper in back window to block sun. not that easy as traveling 65 miles per hour ... accidentally (and only temporarily) rolled teri's fingers in window which was very exciting but no injuries. otherwise beautiful day for driving ...

Paradise Found

am writing from exotic locale tonight ... is beautiful paradise located in the North. many animals to identify here and wonderful, relatively humidity-free weather. teri and the girls accompanied me on the journey today, and we have safely arrived. of course we are home in Columbus, Mississippi, but sometimes still feels like paradise ...
wonderful night's sleep last night. NO frogs in or near pond so feel new gratitude toward creatures. feel they respect my position on the love pond issue and will heretofore be much more thoughtful when it comes to their mating behavior. after successfully negotiating with squirrel friends feel capable of discussing issues with frogs.
as far as IVF goes, just waiting for my (male readers avert your eyes) period to start ... back to world of infertility we go. certainly know what to expect this time!

Off the Wagon

am no longer mature adult. have fallen off budget wagon. went to old navy to buy groovy belt and ended up with two shirts in addition to aforementioned groovy belt. am ashamed but not in a way that would cause me to return items that absolutely aren't needed, just really cute for spring ... ok, though. tomorrow is new day, and I will get back on the saving money train (looking cute in new shirt.)
not shaping up to be fantastic night ... Anthony is in Shreveport for the night and have just heard frogs in backyard. fervently hoping their mating activities can be confined to some area besides pond so as not to be sleep-deprived due to obnoxious noise.
packing for fun road trip tomorrow ... will write from exotic destination.

Simplicity is Genius

have entered serious economic planning mode to handle upcoming IVF expenses ... have new idea about how to save money. is simple, really, just don't spend it. simplicity is the genius of new plan. will not go hungry or let bills go unpaid but will keep excess spending to a minimum. after all, do not really need new summer clothes ... gasoline for trips to Mobile is more important. will prioritize carefully ... am mature adult.
on that note must tell about wonderful Friday with now 2-year-old Canon. spent day with him and laughed constantly. against better judgment allowed him (actually assisted is more like it) to remove ALL the wipes from the baby wipe dispenser. within minutes was throwing self on floor and having baby wipe war with wonderful natured child. even was compelled to re-enact sliding into home base when played little league softball. was fun except for gigantic carpet burn and continuous discovery of baby wipes all over living room. was worth it.
intriguing "Locusts" movie coming on tonight ... mindless programming which sounds fascinating and perfect for newfound interest in natural disasters, plagues, etc.

Air for Money

have new money-making idea to raise money for upcoming medical co-pays, increased gasoline for numerous trips to Mobile, etc. as we move back to IVF mode. am doing calligraphy on (cousin) Kelly's wedding invitations. picked them up today and were packed in a box with plastic bags of air as a cushion. brilliant idea .... someone actually becoming rich off of AIR. seems simple enough idea but how to capitalize?? will think super hard ...
surprises continue today ... called favorite IVF nurse Sabrina and discovered can be re-starting IVF cycle in about two and a half weeks. very caught off guard as thought it would take longer to be worked into the schedule. however know without a doubt God has a plan ... must trust Him ...
no air raid sirens from deck-building neighbors today ... at least not during the short portion of the day I was home. wish them luck but still know we beat them to it ...

Return to IVF?

have interesting and very unexpected news today ... had follow-up appt. with neurologist this afternoon, who was very satisfied with response to migraine meds. am getting much better at distinguishing between normal sinus headache and headache that precedes horrific migraine. neurologist suggested I talk to OB/GYN about current migraine meds to see which, if any, of them are ok to take during pregnancy. lucky day as had appt. with OB/GYN immediately after neurologist appt. to GREAT surprise, dr. said all three meds currently using to control migraines are safe during pregnancy. suggested we return to IVF promptly. hmmm...
on home front have finally inched ahead in neighborhood yardcare olympics. feel HUGE competition currently circulating among friendly neighbors as spring is here and neighborhood is abuzz with lawnmowers and weedeaters. live next door to wonderful family ... dad is retired military and works at Home Depot so yard is always immaculate and perfect. neighbor beat us to mulching flowerbeds by two sad little days a couple of weeks ago. however, we beat them to planting lovely garden masterpiece by a LOT ... perhaps they are happy with their perfect shrubs as have made no attempt to plant flowers so no competition there really. however, huge yard victory tonight as anthony beat them to cutting backyard. have won gold medal for the moment ... can almost hear national anthem as flag is raised ... but wait, national anthem is interrupted by neighbors two doors down who are building a deck. HIDEOUS power tools sound like air raid sirens but have won gold medal there as already have deck. another victory ...

I've Always Got Paris

would like to take a moment for a Mr. (Mrs??) Rambo update ... still believe tiny bird is becoming a woman but okay with this as he/she is delightful little creature with much personality. roxy and rambo spend their days singing to each other and are such fun to watch :)
have gotten attached to sunday night natural disaster-type movies ... just saw preview for "Locusts" coming on this Sunday. enjoyed super-volcano movie recently as well as some gigantic, never-could-actually-happen earthquake movie. no idea why attracted to disasters of the earth but is a fact. perhaps because made an A in college geology, though no longer speak about college experience with geography as is sad and very self-esteem lowering. barely know where australia is but could discuss continental drift theory for hours. do now know that Paris is a city not a country. victory.

Home Sweet Home

(Update: have made excellent progress with squirrels today ... simply needed to serve new variety of food in open-air cafeteria that is our backyard.)
continue to see disturbing commercial on tv about Dyson vacuum. seems mr. dyson has spent 14 years developing this vacuum which produces 100,000 times the force of gravity. is very proud of himself on commercial ... I, however, am fearful that vacuum could be cause of hideous household accident. would be afraid might suck carpet right up or worse, my foot...
gigantic mosquito (think unnaturally huge) flew into our home earlier. (why does home continue to attract such creatures??) was afraid might carry small Hope away so chased it around living room with more enthusiasm than can say with any dignity. finally threw self on floor and smashed it with paper towel ... ashamed to kill such innocent creature but not really as it posed serious threat to household members. have right to protect home from intruders ...

Birthday Boy

has been fun day for Anthony's 32nd birthday ... gave him XM Radio, which is basically satellite radio for his car. as is operated by satellite programming XM is mostly commercial-free, and continuous seeking of clear stations is not needed. perfect for him and his day travels across south Mississippi and Louisiana ... a little envious as did not realize all the really cool things XM does. has been installed in his car and he's ready to go. used his birthday money/giftcards to get cool new lawnmower -- solid black and very sleek.
am fighting semi-losing battle with the overwhelming amount of pollen down here. sneezing a LOT and very fearful of blowing out new septum alignment with repeated foghorn-like blowing of the nose. actually my precious husband compares the sound to the downshifting of an 18-wheeler ... is really a matter of opinion. still big improvement over normal occurrences around this time of year: perpetual sickness resulting in remaining in bed for at least a week with kleenex stuck up my nose and wishing someone would mercifully remove my sinuses. much better this year so far ...

Errand Basket

have been forgetting to mention lately but have invented ingenius little item ... is called the errand basket. have noticed blur of never-ending errands necessary to keep life going. after day of running errands always used to have unorganized pile of "stuff" -- deposit slips, DVD's, books, stamps, etc. if lucky, items would remain in pile (though disorganized) on front seat but usually ended up in floorboard, on side of passenger seat, etc. decided to find a not-too-small but not-too-huge basket to contain errand "stuff" in front seat and have been doing much better lately. simply bring lovely basket into home and unpack contents. no more laying in the floorboard like a moron digging around for whatever fell under the seat. is also good for preparing for a day of errands as simply put things into basket for errands that need to be done that day. very organized ...
continue work with squirrels. will update progress here ...

This Is My Life

Update: met with leader of squirrel union today and currently looking for way to reach compromise ...
(**aside: grateful to be only child with very active imagination :)
Mr. Rambo Update: concerned that beautiful white Mr. Rambo is not only turning aqua blue but is also working very hard at turning into Mrs. Rambo.
read in news today that britney spears is pregnant, which of course has been a rumor running rampant for the last several weeks. happy for her and hope all goes well. wish her husband would stop with the baggy, so-long-they-might-as-well-be-jeans shorts but must not judge him based on appearance. also must not project self in that situation and be bitter about current delay in IVF treatment ... working on patience and acceptance. certain that my pregnancy someday will be HUGE news and on all the major networks just as britney's is. know jennifer aniston will play me in inspiring movie about my life ...

Squirrels on Strike

with hesitant optimism I report that frogs have NOT been heard from since last entry ... must not say too much in case of jinxing situation. expect rain late this afternoon, which seems to encourage their reproductive behavior ...
weekend was great fun with wedding shower ... gifts that were wrestled with to get in car were entirely worth it as Kelly and Michael were happy. also had family birthday breakfast Sunday morning to celebrate April 14 birthday of both Matt and Anthony. must be obnoxious family as hostesses seemed determined to keep door CLOSED to our party room at all times.
see on internet today that martha stewart is now complaining about house arrest portion of her sentence. feel she should count her blessings and be happy to be home at all. perhaps she has inhaled one too many cans of cooking spray during her marathon baking sessions and is no longer thinking clearly. despite current feelings toward martha cannot wait to be among viewers of her new reality "Apprentice" type show in fall. will be big hit ...
speaking of martha have just discovered squirrels are digging in new gardening masterpiece in front yard. very appalled as feed squirrels constantly and enjoy friendly relationship with them. have nicknames for several of them and now feel betrayed that "Scar" and "Humpback" are digging up beautiful flowers. perhaps they act out of anger and this is their version of a union on strike. hmmm -- must consider improving living conditions for fun little squirrels.

Return of the Love Pond

Has been most interesting day ... did morning errands in preparation for Saturday's outdoor gardening/tool shower for Michael and Kel. Can't post many details but will say volunteered to do shopping for out-of-town family so found self in Home Depot parking lot in wrestling match with large gifts that would not fit into car. after numerous tries finally crammed one especially huge gift in back seat ... feel Kel may have same packing problem after shower as she and I have the same kind of car. oh, well.
Has been storming all day here. rain is pouring; the weather people continue their "weather alert" barrage, and I resumed work on my ark. most disturbing occurrence of day was return of frogs to our love pond. frogs becoming very bold as are now emitting OBNOXIOUS mating call in broad daylight. cannot describe aforementioned call ... is beyond words. must report that actually caught frogs "in the act" out bedroom window. image has scarred me for life.

Road Trip

returned from excellent road trip last night ... Kelly (older cousin by 36 hours) and I went to Louisiana to a jeweler to look at wedding rings. interesting happenings for most of the trip, as is often the case with long road trips. passed a man riding a bike against the flow of traffic carrying one oar?? no boat in sight so was very curious as to what he was doing. met a not at all well-disciplined child in the the line at Wendy's who continuously bumped against my purse and rattled the wooden hand rails obnoxiously. (in his defense purse these days is large so all migraine medicines will fit ... is really size of small suitcase.) did not get best cooks at Wendy's as the cheese on my "cheeseburger" was not even remotely melted. had two men on highway in a white car laugh hysterically at us as they passed. and of course, the obligatory truck driver honking at us.
to top it off, Kelly and I were both having minor sinus malfunctions ... my still-healing nose now sounds like a very LOUD foghorn when I blow it. most mortifying so no longer blow nose in public. was on couch last night at home and frightened mr. roxie and mr. rambo when I blew my nose. they actually huddled together on the perch as though a predator was on the loose. low point of day for sure.

Death of a Pope

I'm taking a momentary break from my "normal" life to reflect on the death of Pope John Paul II. Although I'm a relatively "new" Catholic ( I spent around 25 years being Methodist), I am very aware of the impact Pope John Paul had not only on Catholics, but on Christians all over the globe. I'm also very, very aware of his physical ailments and how he has silently suffered these last few years as he carried out his duties. Perhaps the quote which has most struck me during all the tv coverage of his last days was when Pope John Paul said he abandoned himself to Christ, which to me was a humbling indicator of his unfailing faith.
The death of a pope is certainly not one which occurs frequently, and in the coming days and months all the unfoldings at the Vatican should be very interesting. In the meantime, we are left to pray for the soul of Pope John Paul II, which is very clearly a privilege ...

Building the Ark

had eight inches of rain here since last night so am currently downloading plans from Lowes.com on how to construct an ark. will soon run down and buy necessary lumber, etc. so can commence to building. seems practical idea, although after rain stops, storing huge ark may pose a problem. perhaps will utilize boat storage facility. am excited about prospect of building ark with own two hands and know neighbors will be jealous as we float around the neighborhood. will be beautiful vessel but must think of a name. on other hand, as rain has presently stopped wonder how ark will float?? perhaps was not good idea. will read paper instead to keep on top of worldly happenings.

Victory

am writing today as distraction to avoid current task at hand ... anthony and I are working on the marriage prep courses with newly engaged couples at our church. have new couple starting tuesday with new program and am just now looking over guide manual. to begin, we're supposed to draw a family tree as an example for the couples to draw out their own families. sounds easy but designated signs and symbols are completely confusing. do not consider myself to be a dumb person (unless topic is geography) but somehow have drawn my family tree so that I am now married to my parents as opposed to being born of them ?!?! cannot possibly be this difficult. Anthony will be home soon and feel certain he will know what to do.
have had another wonderful day outdoors putting out mulch and flowers and mowing the grass. simply pretend I am working on the impeccable landscaping at DisneyWorld and have great fun. also is great fun because previous hideous sinus/allergy calamities would have kept me indoors but they are (for the moment and knock on wood) conquered. victory.

Biker Girl

am absolutely appalled at gas prices today ... went to fill up tank and had to re-mortgage house in order to pay for gas. wonder if there is some way to produce gasoline from own land, perhaps like digging for oil can dig in backyard until locate gasoline. in meantime, will go to wal-mart and buy cost-effective bicycle for daily driving. will feel free as wind blows through hair knowing that I am powering bike not ridiculously expensive gasoline. wonder what color bike I will get?? perhaps red with safety flag on bike. on second thought, is almost eighty degrees today and feel certain bikes have no air conditioning system. plus, what hairdo is appropriate for wind-whipped hair?? having second thoughts about bike idea.

Flowers for Martha

Have spent gorgeous afternoon outdoors planting flowers ... feel even martha stewart would approve, especially in light of her new "softer" personality since leaving prison. always feel closer to God when am one with nature, particularly as need God's protection when accidentally digging up huge and likely poisonous worm creatures. though was sad about it, gigantic but flowering weeds were pulled, an always distressing chore as they seem to grow so well. outdoor activity will be large test for allergies as pollen abounds. interesting to see how I will react. (perhaps interesting only to me but interesting nonetheless.) neighbors out this afternoon as well (is everyone on break from IVF like me??) working in their yards, creating a "Leave It To Beaver" feeling of neighborhood unity and simpler times. feel should leave front door wide open to welcome neighbors in for piano sing-along and hot homemade apple pie. two problems with this, however: no piano in house and no idea how to make apple pie. plus welcome feeling has passed and am now going to take long shower while deep conditioning hair.

Frogger

have been neglecting blog recently and for no particular reason. am back now and reporting in on latest wildlife event. as many know we live in house with a koi pond just outside our window. pond is apparently love pond as last spring NUMEROUS frogs arrived there to loudly issue their mating call for the course of several months. did not at first understand what was happening as raised blinds one morning to look out on one pond and saw one frog riding around piggyback style on another frog in the pond's current. called anthony over to see fun-loving frogs, thinking frogs were merely engaging in morning merriment. not so as soon after a large stream of eggs was floating along with them. frogs were engaging in morning merriment alright but merriment of the variety that produces baby frogs. however, worst part of story is LOUD mating call occurs primarily at night and keeps certain members of household (ME) awake. currently working on feasible solution as need sleep.

The Passion of the Christ

(Update on sweet Mary: she returned to the vet today to have her stitches removed; however, and not to our surprise, her front right paw had to remain re-bandaged due to the fact that she pulled that stitch out last week. They put a clean bandage on, and she goes back on Friday to have it checked again. God bless Mary ...)
With Easter just around the corner, I have felt a nagging need to watch "The Passion of the Christ," which I did today. Having never seen the movie but inundated with all the press it received last year, I was unsure exactly what to expect, I just felt like I should watch it. Now don't get me wrong, watching this movie is not a decision to be made lightly because it is extraordinarily violent to the point of barbarism and incredibly bloody. Although I understand this is only Mel Gibson's vision of the Crucifixion of Christ, I find it hard to believe that the actual occurrence was very far from what was on the screen. The experience I had was almost beyond words ... I have heard the scriptures read since I was a little girl but never in my life have I actually considered the immense and excrutiating suffering Jesus endured to save us from sin. The movie portrays this suffering in absolutely unflinching detail, and at times it is almost impossible to watch yet equally impossible to look away. There are some incredibly beautiful scenes, many involving Jesus' mother, and the final image is absolutely triumphant and breathtaking. Not to overstate, but watching "The Passion of the Christ" is a life-altering event and one that most certainly will remain with you.
May God continue to bless us all ...

Return of Deck Creatures

having somewhat serious day as is holy week and focusing on upcoming easter celebration ... however, being me, am still having bizarre little life issues such as return of under-the-deck creatures. my sweet mary (when not stealthily chewing off the bandages on her paws) is back to sniffing the deck while looking through the cracks to see underneath. am disturbed by this as after several minutes of looking her tail begins to wag as if she's seen another animal friend. got up courage to also look through cracks (certain that eyes would be gouged out by deadly animal) but saw nothing but dirt. concentrating on turtle theory as like that one the best.
still somewhat recovering from sinus surgery ... able to breathe through two nostrils now and very much enjoying this new feeling but neck is still swollen near incision site and feel like frankenstein with stitch scars. know scar will fade though and will not give in to superficial concerns. have new sinus rinsing system to thoroughly cleanse nostrils each night. is very weird but oddly comforting sensation. simply mix solution and use bottle to shoot up into one nostril until it comes out the other side. feels very much like when was younger and would get water up nose at pool but makes perfect sense as that is exactly what is happening. am so profound and wise today.

Freezer Farewell

enjoying wonderful weekend ... went to Palm Sunday service this morning and now at home waiting for torrential downpour continuously predicted by weather people.
only writing today to report that Miss Callie is moments away from burial. have located appropriate final resting place and it is not the freezer. rest in peace, miss callie.

Two Plus Two

Am singing praises of Roto Rooter today ... commode has been unfortunately stopped up for the last few days. if anyone read Wednesday's entry can put two and two together (no pun intended) and figure out why. anyway is now unstopped and we are back to two fully functioning commodes. when wonderful repairman arrived this am found self unexpectedly feeling guilty about still wearing pajamas. while he worked on commode felt compelled to sit on couch and type furiously on laptop as if am important executive-type person working from home. then remembered am still recovering from gross sinus surgery and am allowed to be lazy and put away laptop. consoled myself with the thought that when recovery is complete will commence to creating landscape masterpiece outdoors and doing intensive spring cleaning indoors. perhaps will be year I will let cassette tape of "footloose" go. doubt it as is such good music.

Living The Grudge

(Must begin with a happy birthday to my dad!!)
have just returned from doctor ... stitches removed and keloid theory blown completely out of water. wonderful doctor said area is just swollen with a possible hematoma, meaning he may have to drain some blood off when I return in two weeks. joy.
now to continue the grudge conversation from yesterday. for those who don't know the grudge is a remake of a Japanese film ( I think it's Japanese.) in the re-make they used lots of japanese actors, including scary children who kept jumping out at innocent people such as sarah michelle gellar. anthony felt it would be humorous to hiss at me this morning like scary kids in the grudge. not amused at all, especially when he did it over the phone. anywho, as I left dr's office, cell phone rang with a number I didn't recognize. answered anyway and heard someone speaking (wait for it) Japanese on the other end. not kidding at all. was very eerie, particularly when scary voice left an incomprehensible message. coincidence?? I doubt it. Anthony has conjured scary children into our lives. way to go. am now living the grudge. just what I need.

8:10 PM
Returned awhile ago from Irish Coast Pub with some of Anthony's work friends ... feel getting old as smoke, crowds and loud music were no longer fun but annoying. glad to be home in flannel pj's by fire watching march madness.
have officially become redneck ... arrived home to find sweet mary's entire right paw bandage on floor. had to re-bandage her using duct tape to hold it on. discussed using leftover moustache bandage tape from last week but figured too easy to chew through. feel duct tape is one of the best inventions ever. from hemming pants to re-bandaging dog's paws it never lets you down. except when it comes to warding off frightening children from the grudge.

Victory for Mary

Due to very poorly timed and unfortunate mini stomach bug calamity will have stitches removed tomorrow. have been ill all day but feeling much better now so will go tomorrow afternoon to wonderful ENT doctor ... looking forward to stitch removal and presenting my keloid theory to doctor like some sort of brilliant medical layperson. feel have learned A LOT lately about various medical happenings. speaking of, sweet mary's pathology report came back today, and everything looks fine. very grateful and blessed. just to show off new grasp of medical terms she officially had a benign perianal gland adenoma.
am now watching "the grudge" alone in house ... questioning this decision as movie is very creepy and scary with many frightening looking children jumping out. strange movie but feel need to follow through as am not quitter. (do wonder why all scary movie participants don't just run from threatening children, etc. instead of re-entering house, elevator, or other structure to re-encounter said threateners and usually die.) will be glad when Anthony gets home from work.

Keloid Theory

stitch removal re-scheduled for tomorrow afternoon. have new theory regarding continued swelling on neck. believe may be a keloid. will have to ask excellent doctor tomorrow.
still choosing appropriate burial ground for Miss Callie. she remains in garage freezer. in meantime, mr. rambo has made himself right at home and has bonded very well with mr. roxy...have just realized how bizarre all this must sound.

Home Sweet Freezer

am struggling with filling out comment card from surgical center ... had excellent pre-op care, but post-op care was not so excellent. don't feel that nurses should have to be hunted for in manner of scavenger hunt when one needs them following surgery. wrote this on card ( not those exact words) but am now feeling hideously guilty as don't want to offend anyone. Anthony (who was also present at the time) agrees with me about post-op care so will mail card tomorrow.
*post-op update: nose no longer whistling like tea kettle ... neck still swollen and sore but will have stitches removed tomorrow and will be able to ask excellent doctor about swelling. Sweet Mary is back to her old self and is stealthily gnawing on the bandages on her feet when she has a chance. can't remember if mentioned her dew claws were removed during perianal adenoma surgery since we were paying for anesthesia anyway as she often cracks them and they are merely extra unused part of paws. veterinarian dad suggested this.
Mr. Rambo has made himself at home and is happily residing with Mr. Roxy... Miss Callie is wrapped up in freezer until can figure out appropriate place to bury her. realize her residence in freezer may appear humorous but is actually just practical. also, freezer home of Miss Callie is in garage not in kitchen.

IVF Ramblings

5:10 PM
Well, Mr. Rambo is now officially a part of our family, and Mr. Roxy has accepted him very well. Mr. Rambo is solid white with just a hint of blue on his tail feathers, and he is very handsome.
To update the progression of my sinus surgery recovery... I can now breathe better through one nostril (the swellling will take several weeks to go away completely), but it sounds like a tea kettle whistling on the stove. Also, Anthony says I am now snoring at night. Good grief.

Rambo

It has been my experience that early morning phone calls which awaken you very rarely bring good news. Such was the case today ...
We had to take Miss Callie to the Vet Emergency Room last night (actually Anthony took her) because she very suddenly dropped to the bottom of her cage and wouldn't move at all. I took her out and held her for awhile, certain she was about to die. However, after 30 minutes or so I decided maybe we (Anthony) should take her to the ER in case there was anything they could do. She didn't appear to be suffering at all, but I just wanted to make sure we had done all we could. She has been to the ER several times and always been seen by the same vet, who is extremely compassionate and caring. Luckily he was there last night ... he took her, gave her a shot and said he wanted to watch her overnight, but there were no guarantees she would live. Well, early this morning he called to say she had died. I wasn't at all surprised, but I was extremely grateful he could make her comfortable during the night. Anthony will be going to Petsmart this afternoon to get a new parakeet we will call Rambo (yes, we think it's funny also.) We still have our other parakeet (Mr. Roxy), who is only two years old, and I know he'll be glad to have a new friend as he has been looking for Miss Callie. Life goes on ...

The Joy of the Moustache Bandage

Ok, I'm taking a tiny break from my VERY non-productive existence in recovering from surgery to return to this webpage ... In order to maintain what shred of dignity I have left, I will only say that Tuesday was absolutely NOT one of the best days of my life. Sinus surgery is not necessarily painful but fairly gross. Just suffice to say that what goes down the throat during this surgery (lots of blood apparently) must come back up. If it sounds gross, only imagine experiencing the joyful day I had. Adding to the joy was the "moustache bandage" I wore for 48 hours after surgery. This high-tech bandaging requires a folded up piece of gauze that is taped under the nostrils. It was changed very frequently after surgery, but I finally got to take the whole contraption off yesterday, leaving lovely adhesive marks on my face where the tape was. Fabulous. Each day has been a little better, thank the good Lord above!! They removed my lymph node on the right side of my neck, which required a two-inch incision, and I'll have the stitches taken out on Tuesday. It's not overly attractive, although several people who have seen the incision site say the stitches are beautifully done. We'll see ... At least I still recognize myself.
In the meantime, I have been watching very important movies and resting. I must highly recommend "Wimbledon" and especially "13 Going on 30." Both movies were really cute and sweet and ended happily. Mom, Dad, Anthony ( best nurses EVER) and I will be screening "Laws of Attraction" tonight ...
Lest I forget to mention that sweet Mary is in surgery even as I write. She'll be coming home late this afternoon so we can recuperate together.
Thank you for the many phone calls of support as I get over this most messy surgery. I know in the end (whenever that may be) it'll be worth it so I can breathe properly, which must be a wonderful thing!

Bye Bye Salamanders

(FYI: Miss Callie is still hanging in there ...)
Ok, friends have suggested deck noises are perhaps turtles under deck laying eggs ... I very much like that possibility as eliminates scarier theories relating to hellbender salamanders. Will enjoy raising and nurturing baby turtles when time comes. Will call them appropriate names such as Franklin and such and perhaps take them for walks around the neighborhood. Or not as neighbors might feel I am crazy.
Surgery on for tomorrow ... still concerned about face but confident will recognize self after surgery. Looking forward to proper breathing utilizing both nostrils. Will return to this webpage soon ...

Juicy Couture

(Update on Miss Callie: still fairly tired-looking. unsure about vet's diagnosis ... have had pet parakeet who had to be put to sleep because he had a tumor, and her symptoms look very similar. However, am not vet and will wait and see.)
Must take moment to make movie recommendation ... went to see "The Pacifier" last night and loved it!! Hideous movie reviews but still thought movie was really cute. Parts were cheesy but still a wonderful feel-good movie. Will be surprised if movie doesn't open number one at box office this weekend. Theater where we were was PACKED ...
Have picked out comfortable outfit for Tuesday's surgery. Will wear sweatpants with matching zip-up sweat jacket (in wonderfully complimentary color) and no shirt underneath. Was at first concerned about this as could only picture Jennifer Lopez in her Juicy Couture sweatsuits with only sweatsuit jacket and no shirt underneath and big cleavage showing. Realized that have no cleavage to speak of, so problem solved. Feel it's important to wear something I can slip back into that doesn't have to go over head as expect nose and neck to be sore. Must not sacrifice fashion despite that will have on no make-up or toenail polish. Not to mention may be nauseous from anesthesia and dignity will be out the window along with heinous hospital gown. Too much info ...

An Ounce of Patience

oh wish that life would calm down just a smidge ... awoke this morning to find Miss Callie (one of our two parakeets) fluffed up, shivering and lethargic. went to favorite aviary doctor, whose office is first come, first serve (NO appointments). took Miss Callie, good book and settled in waiting room. after two hours, at least 10 different dogs (two of whom were having a serious emergency), about seven cats, an iguana and a guinea pig, favorite doctor called us back. looks as if miss callie has sinusitis and possibly some other infections ... again, pathology reports will be back within a week on the sample he took from her. came home with antibiotic to simply mix with her water. here begins the interesting part ... bottle states clearly to add one ounce of liquid antibiotic into one gallon of water and use that to fill and re-fill her water supply each day. no problem, except not sure how much one ounce is. afraid too much antibiotic will kill tiny bird and too little will do no good. commence to running around house seeking something that will measure just one ounce. think shot glass is one ounce but not positive. kitchen measuring devices show milliliters and such but converting to ounces requires the restoration hardware pocket reference book and a calculator and just don't have that kind of energy after hours spent at the vet. check medicine cabinet for plastic measuring device as would accompany robitussin, etc. but nothing there. become slightly distraught as sure antibiotic therapy is key to Miss Callie's regaining her health. in desperation try turkey basting device as discover has ounce measurement on it but definitely did not work. then ... hark, see that bottle containing antibiotic is VERY clearly marked in ounces, so simply pour one ounce into leftover Hurrican Ivan bottled water and give to tiny Miss Callie. consider taking some myself as am now very tired from whole experience ...

Sweet Mary

Sweet Mary will live!! The spot was a tumor called a perianal adenoma, but it is benign. God is good!! We have two approaches we can take: one is conservative, which simply involves watching the spot; the other involves removing it entirely, which is the route we elected to go. So next Friday Mary will have the adenoma removed ... it's outpatient surgery, so she'll be home that afternoon. In other words, half of our little family of four is having surgery next week. Should be most exciting!!
After reading my dad's posting on the guestbook (and a bit of internet research to verify he wasn't making info up) I am now thinking what lives under our deck is a hellbender salamander. In actuality I saw a site that says they can become 29 inches in length, which is ominous considering the internet said they prefer to walk as opposed to slithering around. Maybe he'll knock on our backdoor soon?? Good lord.

Vet Calamity

have not ventured onto deck today ... Anthony is home and will check for deck creature in the daylight when he gets home from work tomorrow.
just to keep life interesting, my sweet Mary (our 6-year-old black lab) is in a medical calamity. had small mass on her hind quarters (polite phrasing) that had to be popped on Saturday. tissue samples sent to Miss. State for pathology report ... of course vet called while I was at church earlier today and left message on my voicemail saying he had results and to call him to discuss them. by the time I got message vet was closed so freaked out and assumed results will show cancer and I will have to get a job to pay for Mary's chemotherapy. (am surprisingly calm in human crisis situations but not when animals are involved) called dad (who fortunately is a vet), and he suspects she merely has an inflamed anal gland. will call FIRST thing tomorrow to get results. am prepared for anything at this point...
five days until sinus surgery but seems unimportant considering Mary's medical crisis.
(FYI: realize am most probably overreacting to situation but is not my fault as come from a LONG line of overreacting family members.)

Deck Creatures

ah, the joys of cooler weather ... jungle temps have given way to unseasonably cooler weather here on the Gulf Coast. feel temp change is a direct result of another shift in the atmosphere resulting in a re-direction of the jetstream, thereby minimizing global warming and allowing reduction in earth's temps. sounds good anyway.
have potentially large calamity on hands. was on back deck today with laptop ... felt would be extremely hip to sit in the beautiful sun and compute something. only problem is sun was SO bright could not even remotely read computer screen. anyway, as I was sitting on deck (no idea why I was not in chair) I heard constant yet intermittent knocking under deck. listened closely, though not actually putting head onto deck surface for fear of source of knocking coming through deck to capture me. noticed mary and hope sniffing deck earlier in the day so feel large creature is habitating under the deck. fear it has mated and knocking was baby creatures signaling they were hungry to mom creature who was out hunting. will heretofore be extremely cautious on deck. on flip side feel good about home as is obviously warm and inviting if strange creatures wish to live here. happy thought.
six days until sinus surgery; IVF far from mind these days.